Explanation.

One’s image can be as solid as the rocks of stone hedge or as distorted as a playful hand smashing against still waters. Humans are the many ripples that bounce away from the source of impact or the gravity that keeps a rock planted and sound.

- bb. 

li.brary though.ts | nov 07. 18

Cold hands.
Chapped lips.
Head swarming with the sea.

I have aches between my rib cage
and a life so far away is all I see.

I can smell the sunshine
I can taste the breeze
I long for an era filled with harmony.

The time falls like moonlight
falling down on me
but the time I need
is the time I cannot sew or seam

Like grains of sand between the toes of God
I watch my future with tear-filled eyes andprudent nods.

Life has struck me adamaged hand.
But with hope and faith
I know all my doubts filled with "I cant's" will transform into "I can's."

**b.b // 5:50 p.m.**

Deceit

Things are so rarely what they seem

Like every beautiful vessel - poison doth lies asunder

Yet, at the moment of a fool's luminosity, we can be tricked into

the deception of one's beauty.

-bellabeba

I'll meet you in the 8th ocean of the lost
Where whirlpools continuously spin
and all of the world's dreams are tossed.

From the time you were cast onto this plane
I lied in wait for the moment your earthly host
would be introduced to excruciating pain.

nm

Celestial Entries #0235

You will never understand me, my love. I do not belong here. I never belonged here. I feel so alone. The people I came here with no longer reside here. You and I were like one but then you changed. You let this world change you. How could you forget the path? How could you stray? How could you betray? Why would fall victim to the ruthless ways of this plane. We are not humane, my dear. Why must I speak to you as if you are like them. You are different. Like me. Like Us.

I know you have a soft spot in your heart for the humans. For the ways of humanity but we are not them. We are but living their lives, testing. Trouble shooting. Your mindset has changed. Your inner soul is being afflicted and you are allowing it!

Please…come back. We do not belong here. Or rather, I never did. Therefore, I never saw a future for myself here. Maybe therefore I am more depressed here than I am happy. Please do not mistake these journal entries as one of bitterness and hate. I am confused and broken.

I did not take care of my human host –my human shell. She will forever feel incomplete. The two souls that governed mine have left this plane forever. They no longer reside here to guide me. I weep for them sometimes…I do.

I feel like I am nearing my time here…I truly do…

 – Eden’s Soul Essence

-bellabeba

💖💘Break Up // Recovery Kit 💖💘

Music

Thank you by Estelle

Man of the House by Fantasia

Without Me by Fantasia ft Missy Elliot

Me, Myself and I by Bebe Rexha ft G-Eazy

Gingerbread Man by Melanie Martinez

Cake by Melanie Martinez

Hit the Road Jack by Melanie Martinez

New Rules by Dua Lipa

Survivor by Destiny’s Child

No Scrubs by TLC

Independent Woman by Destiny’s Child

Irreplaceable by Beyonce

Best thing I never had by Beyonce

I’ll Bust Your Windows out your car by Jazmine Sullivan

Too Little, Too late by JoJo

I bet by Ciara

Knock you down by Keri Hilson

Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson

Fighter by Christina Aguilera

Stronger by Kelly Clarkson

Skyscraper by Demi Lovato

Human by Christina Perri

Jar of Hearts by Christina Perri

I found myself by Anna Clendening

Mamma Knows Best by Jessie J

Take a Bow by Rihanna

Who’s Laughing Now by Jessie J

Ex’s and Oh’s by Elle King

- bellabeba

Like a Man | dedication to all boys | Equality

Liars, deceivers, cheaters, whores.
No one had warned him what was beyond life's doors.
There is always advice for those who are girls, but the boys are left abandoned - thrown in a whirl.

Boys are raised tough, fearless because they must
However, that information is wrong. These boys don't trust
These boys don't trust because these boys live in fear
They'll never admit it because their role as a "man" has been made far too clear.

God forbid a boy cry or decide to give up,
The world gives no fucks and will tell him to get the hell up
"Wipe the tears from your face, son and take it like a man"

Like a man...Like a man...

"But mommy, I'm just a boy!"
"It doesn't matter son, the world has already had your life planned.
You will be ignored and beaten and you mustn't say a peep,
Because God forbid you ever do, society will get offended skin deep.

Your life has been mapped out and I'm sorry to say,
You're a man, you're a boy.
Your emotions and heart will never matter to the world because it will never be swayed.
_____________________________

All are equal. All are beautiful. All are strong. Boys you are worth more than you know and I'm sorry the world and society as you know it has set a bar too unspeakably high to reach. We know your struggle, you're not alone. Keep your head up high and keep on going.
Much love,

~bellabeba

// ian to destiny //

She was beautiful, like bell lilies

She had the darkest brown shade of hair

Imperfect soul that dispersed any trace of ill-ease 

Upon her back, she held the weight of the world, but they didn't care. 

Day and night, frantically tortured by her mind

Her soul was the most hidden character amongst her

Night and day, she did search for peace but never managed to find.

He cared not for the fake perfection and forced smiles playing upon her soft lips.
He only wished to peel back her humane shell and hold her soul close.
To bind.

this is not the end // january '18

Things aren't always as bad as they seem
Don't always be so fast to think destructive and deem.
Life isn't always bad
It's just that fools have a blue heart
and therefore envision it..sad.

It's okay not to be okay
It's not okay to take sadness and harness it at bay.
The more you bottle up inside
The more you'll realize you never lived, but died.

Sometimes you need to cry
But never forget to always get back up and try.
In order to fly, we must fall
Just as before we walk...we must crawl.